


Well that was fun.

by Totallycorrectrogues



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Bad Parent Ra's al Ghul, Edward Nygma Being a Good Friend, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Soft Jervis Tetch
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-07
Updated: 2021-02-07
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29263332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Totallycorrectrogues/pseuds/Totallycorrectrogues
Summary: What do you get when you cross the Dork Squad with the al Ghul family and Deathstroke? Well, you get a lot of arguing to say the least.
Relationships: Jonathan Crane & Edward Nygma & Jervis Tetch, Jonathan Crane/Edward Nygma, Ra's al Ghul & Slade Wilson, Talia al Ghul & Nyssa Raatko & Dusan al Ghul, Talia al Ghul & Slade Wilson
Kudos: 8





	Well that was fun.

Jonathan Crane was pretty much used to going to the ice cream store. It was pretty much a daily thing, when your best friends are a smartass and what is basically a 30-year old child.

Jon had finished his vanilla ice cream as quickly as he could, but now he had to endure the pain of Edward and Jervis eating as slowly as humanly possible. Jonathan squinted at them as Ed started talking with his mouth full. “S-so anyway... that’s-“

”For goodness sake, Nygma! Did anyone ever teach you to talk without food in your mouth?”

”No.” Edward chuckled. “You know no one did.”

”Well that doesn’t give you a free pass. You know better now.” Jonathan said grumpily.

Jervis quickly finished the ice cream and spoke up, “Jonny, from my observations, Eddie just feels like he can do what he wants, and I think you should let him and not continue taunts.”

”That’s not helping, Jervis!” Jonathan snapped.

Jervis quickly ran behind Edward, who stared at Jonathan. “Oh leave him alone, Jon.”

Then another voice spoke. “Well well well. Looks like someone got in trouble.”

The three looked around and saw the dark figure of Ra’s al Ghul, who had thrown on some civilian clothing, to ‘blend in’ as he sometimes did. Next to him were two women - his daughters Talia and Nyssa - and two men - his son Dusan as well as Slade Wilson. It looked like a little reunion.

”Mr. al Ghul!” Edward sprung to his feet and shaked the hand of Ra’s. “I’m Edward Nygma, you’ve seen me at the rogue meetings!”

”Yes, yes, I have.” Ra’s said rather quickly as he turned to Jonathan and Jervis, Edward stepping back to his chair and patting Jervis’s head to comfort him. “Mr. Crane. Mr. Tetch.” He dipped his head to each of them, slightly curling back at Jervis. “What happened with you?”

”If I could make an observation, father-“

Talia stopped when Ra’s put up a hand. “I can figure it out by myself, thank you Talia.” He studied Jonathan’s face. “You must have yelled at him. Am I correct?”

Jonathan nodded, and Jervis retreated a little more behind Edward.

”Mr. Tetch, I would prefer it if you sat down.”

Jervis returned to his seat, as Ra’s continued. “You would not mind letting us sit with you?”

Jonathan nodded. “It’s fine by me.”

Ra’s gave a short nod, then turned to Dusan. “Son, get us some chairs, will you?”

Dusan nodded. “Yes, father.” Then he went off.

|-|-|

After they had all sat down, they each started a separate conversation. Edward and Nyssa were discussing their love lives, - Edward would have started that conversation anyway - Jonathan and Slade were talking about defeating Batman, Jervis and Dusan were discussing how their lives are, and Ra’s and Talia were yelling at each other about Bruce. In the end, they all went silent when Ra’s accused Talia of betraying him.

Slade immediately jumped up from his seat. “Mr. al Ghul, your daughter has been nothing but loyal to you. She wouldn’t give up on you for the world.” 

“Why are we getting involved in this?” Edward whispered over to his best friends.

”Because we’re right next to them.” Jonathan whispered back.

“So we happen to be part of the fighting, so I think we should start to be flighting.” Jervis whispered.

”Nah, we have to do something about this.” Edward whispered as Nyssa and Dusan started to get involved.

”Fine, fine.” Jonathan muttered as he rose up. “Excuse me, you five. But... okay, there’s no easy way to put this, so if you want to argue more, you’re welcome to see your fears.”

They went silent, and Slade quickly said, “He’s very honest about that, you know. Take it from me.”

Ra’s snarled. “Fine, we’ll stop arguing. But you better not threaten the Demon’s Head again, Mr. Crane. Or you won’t live to see another day.”

Jonathan nodded and sat down, and everyone else also followed suit. Jervis looked over at Jonathan. “You managed to put yourself in danger to keep the calm, you’re like a doctor applying some balm.”

”You’re making less sense every second I know you.” Jonathan muttered.

”It’s never going to make sense, from here on hence.”

”I’m fine with that.” Edward said. “You do you, Jervis.”

|-|-|

Everyone had gone back to being peaceful. Slade stood up. “It’s been great seeing all of you, but I really should get going. I said I’d meet up with Floyd.”

”I guess we’ll see you next time Joker summons us all.” Jonathan said.

Slade nodded. “See you around, you three. Mr. al Ghul. Talia, Nyssa, Dusan.” He nodded at each of them before leaving.

Ra’s just gave a tired nod of the head. “We should be going too. I hope that we won’t... have an encounter like this again.” He gestured towards his daughters. “Come on.”

But when Dusan went to follow, Ra’s stopped him. “You’re taking another route back.”

Nyssa went to speak up, but quickly went silent when Dusan responded. “I understand, father.”

As they left, Jonathan stared slightly surprised. Edward looked over at them. “Did you notice how much Ra’s wanted to get Dusan away from him?”

Jervis nodded. “A father and a son conflicted, one’s hatred roaring, one’s love restricted.”

“Thank you for saying what we were all thinking.” Jonathan groaned. Jervis and Edward shared a glance.

”I’m just glad you didn’t get hurt.” Edward said. “I would- I mean you could have died, standing up to Mr. al Ghul like that.”

”That’s... touching of you, Edward.” Jonathan said. “But I would have been fine.”

”He could have been immune.” Edward added. “He _is_ 600 years old and uses this ‘Lazarus Pit’ to stay alive.”

”That’s a different subject. I would have been fine.”

“ _Not on your own._ ”

”Edward...”

Edward and Jonathan shared a look. Then Jonathan gave a sigh. “Fine. You win. If trouble comes, then you can help. But don’t expect anything in return.”

Edward smiled. “I can live with that.”

Jervis started to jump in front of their faces. “Did you forget about me? You owe me some tea!”


End file.
